About The Band

A history of Cannibal Face

Cannibal Face:

Born in Malibu California to Douglas and Francine McAllister, Douglas Jr. showed an early interest in music and drugs. After escaping from boarding school at the age of 16 he sought a new life of vagrancy and debauchery. He found his way to the Sunset Strip where he made a living as a professional surfer. However, his career abruptly came to an end in the 2007 while competing in the Eddie Big Wave Competition when he overdosed while surfing a 60-foot wave of the coast of Oahu, Hawaii. To this day the locals refer to him as “The Stoner that Sank like a Stone.” His body was never found and he was presumed dead until, in 2008, a fishing trawler found him caught in their ship’s nets. He couldn’t remember who he was and was given the nickname “Cannibal Face” by the crew due to his skeleton like appearance, likely the result of severe dehydration and his consumption of salt water. Cannibal Face joined the ships crew and sailed the world for two years before he jumped ship off the coast of Australia. A week after his arrival in Sydney he joined a Punk Rock band called “The Fucked Up Fuckers”, taking over for the band’s lead guitar player “Sleazy Pete” after he had lost his hand during an accident while working at a hotdog factory.  Sleazy Pete continued to be the band’s rhythm guitar player but due to his lack of fingers could no longer play lead. The band’s 2010 tour became a complete disaster when the lead singer blew up on stage due to the fact that he had ingested over two gallons of gasoline before lighting a cigarette. Cannibal Face, the only living survivor, became an instant celebrity through radio and international talk show interviews. He formed a solo career and cut an album with “Iggy Lollipop” legendary Punk Rock star which sold over 100 million copies and had ten number one hits. One night the two men after a long night of partying got into an argument about which one of them was uglier. Cannibal Face lost the argument and disappeared in 2013 making the search for him a cult obsession of wannabe Rock stars from around the world. Soon after “Big Time Records” put up a 50 million dollar reward for whoever could find him and return him to the studio. Several governments were overrun after fans stormed their capitals, demanding a second album. Sightings of people eating flesh as a result of ingesting bath salts all around the world were often mistaken for sightings of the true Cannibal Face.

Demonica:

Not much is known about the origin of “Demonica”. But, what we do know was pieced together from ancient Wicca texts, various Opera blogs, and the most recent LGBTQ community newsletters. I know this doesn’t make any sense but it’s the best we have. The story goes something like this: A woman in the state of Georgia had a baby but couldn’t remember how she had it. It simply appeared in her house one day, lying in a crib. Desperate to rid herself of the burden the woman tried to drown the baby five times but each time it showed up in the crib the next morning. So she traveled to the deepest swamps and left the baby there alone for the alligators to eat. The baby began singing the German Opera “Der Freischütz” which attracted the attention of three witches of the swamp known by locals as “The Devil’s Triad”. They raised the baby as their own, teaching her everything they knew, naming her Demonica. When she came of age she was betrothed to Satan himself. But when the day of the wedding came, Demonica left him standing at the alter. Embarrassed and hurt, Satan became the laughing stock of hell. Soon after, she enrolled in a prestigious Opera school in Transylvania, Romania. However, after six months she dropped out in favor of playing the bass in a traveling gypsy band. After a disagreement over the musical direction of the band, Demonica turned her band mates into frogs. Rumors spread about her temper and no one would play with her again, until she met “The Mastermind”. 

The Mastermind

“The Mastermind”, formally known as Sergei Vladimir Ivanov Lebedev was the chief designer and operating engineer of the Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant. His love of Heavy Metal music was renowned but looked down upon by the communist elites in Soviet Russia.  He was brought up on charges of subversion by the Politburo.  His refusal to deny the greatness of Heavy Metal music got him sent to a Gulag in Siberia. While there he made a drum kit out of ice and practiced 13 hours a day, driving all the guards crazy. Eventually he was pardoned when the Soviet Union needed his expertise to run the Chernobyl Power Plant. His contributions were largely a renowned success. However, after drinking vodka all night long, he played a drum solo of epic proportions from the control room of the Power Plant through an amplification system of over 60 thousand watts. The vibrations caused deep ruptures in the building’s foundation resulting in a nuclear meltdown. Unaware of the meltdown and caught in a time warp due to the radioactive material he continued his solo in a drunken stupor for another seven years until a wandering grizzly bear attacked him. After defeating the bear, he wandered aimlessly into the woods. After audioning for hundreds of Heavy Metal bands, he found them to be unworthy of his talents in the service of the pure power of Heavy Metal. Eventually he makes his way to New York, where he an ad in “The Village Voice” that read “Drummer in need of Bass player, Guitar player, and Singer. If you’re not willing to die for your music don’t apply.”

The Formation of Cannibal Face

After years of traveling Demonica found her way to New York City. She lived on the streets preforming bass and singing. After reading the ad taken out by The Mastermind in The Village Voice she decided to audition.  The two hit it off and Demonica convinced The Mastermind that the only suitable front man for the band was the notorious Cannibal Face. After two years of searching Demonica’s contacts in the underworld paid off. She was informed that Satan himself was recruiting Cannibal Face for his own band and that he had sent his demons to bring him back to Hell to begin rehearsals. Demonica discovered that Cannibal Face was spotted ten miles outside of Death Valley, Arizona, by Satan’s minions. Disguised as police, they pursued Cannibal Face across Interstate 95 in an epic car chase.  Cannibal Face refused to be taken alive and drove his 1970 Dodge Challenger over a cliff. Luckily, Demonica and the Mastermind arrived moments before the demons could claim his soul and take him to Hell. In order to save him, The Mastermind kept Cannibal Face’s body alive while Demonica used her magic to keep his soul earthbound. Once back in the Mastermind’s New York Studio, they ran the idea of forming a band to Cannibal Face. His answer was straight and simple: “Fuck yeah”.